Time for a Change

​As Caroline watched her husband get ready for work, she once again wondered at how she had managed to end up in such a situation. How had she, a plain Jane from a boring little town, ended up with someone like him! Even her mother had expressed such a sentiment… although not in words quite so pleasant. From their first meeting, Caroline had known there was something different about him, the way he had met her eyes at the restaurant that night. It had been her mother’s birthday outing (not that the woman had had any kind words to say about the food, the service… anything really). He’d been there, a few tables away, with his girlfriend (apparently, she was a real bunny-boiler). There’d been some sort of altercation- she’d thrown her wine at him- and he’d looked across at Caroline with such apologetic eyes, as if to say, “Well, what can you do?” Caroline had positively swooned under his gaze.

It had been a few months later when their paths crossed. She’d been working in a small hairdressing salon; it was soul destroying. She spent her days making weak cups of tea for old ladies and had the occasional blue rinse or set thrown her way by the head stylist. In the run up to Christmas, the girls had been talking of nothing else but their outfits for the (apparently legendary) staff night out. She wasn’t a drinker and ‘getting wasted’ appeared to be their intended outcome, but after being continually cajoled she’d finally conceded. She’d agreed to go for a couple of hours, no more, no less. It was a night that changed her life forever.

That night had gone from bad to worse. After being virtually ignored all evening, Katy, the junior, had vomited down the front of Caroline’s (almost new) dress. She’d been mortified. Caroline had spent the next half hour in the pub toilet desperately trying to clean herself up to no avail. The sour stink had assaulted her nostrils and her dress had a terrible yellow stain. With tears burning her eyes she’d screwed up the wad of tissues that had failed to clean the mess and thrown them angrily into the bin as she’d felt the first hot streaks on her cheeks. Pushing the toilet door open, she’d lowered her head and pushed through the crowds towards the safety of the exit. She’d almost made it. She’d knocked into someone, heard shouts telling her to watch herself, then had come the shove. As if in slow motion she’d felt herself lurch forwards, her hands still gripping her jacket around her to hide the soiled dress. As face and floor had been only seconds away from becoming the best of friends, she’d felt a strong arm grip her own and pull her back to her feet. And so, it had begun.

It had been a bit of a whirlwind romance. No more than three months later they had moved in together, much to the chagrin of her mother. Not to be trusted she said… eyes too close together… just like her waste of space father. She’d been more than happy to finally escape that woman’s clutches. She was 36 and terrified of spending the rest of her life alone with just her mother for company. The women at the salon had whispered behind her back at first… not single… nothing but a philanderer… being taken for a fool… but it hadn’t been long before they’d grown tired of old gossip and moved on to chatting about banal reality tv programmes. Caroline hadn’t listened to any of their vicious lies, she knew the real Pete after all. He was so attentive, and such a joker! Once he’d bought her a beautiful pair of sapphire earrings and told her earnestly how he hadn’t been able to resist their beauty that almost matched hers, how they matched her eyes. At first, she was upset, after all, her eyes were hazel! Then, she’d seen the beginning of the smile as it played along the edge of his lips. Within the year, they were married. No fairy-tale wedding like the dreams of her childhood, just a quick registry office service. She had supposed in a way it was romantic, spur of the moment. Her mother had refused to attend.

Now, here she was, five wonderful years later, watching as Pete packed the lunch she had painstakingly made into his bag. Fine lines danced at the edge of her eyes as she smiled. Sure, things weren’t like they were at the start but that was perfectly normal, wasn’t it? The heady romance, the passion, the wanting to be with each other every waking moment, had dissipated into more of a comfortable silence. Not that Pete had ever really been a big talker. Over the past year, his work had been taking him up and down the country and he’d been snowed under, what with having to wine and dine clients all the time. It seemed like there was hardly a week went past where he didn’t have to stay late at the office or spend a few nights away at one of the company’s other locations. It was hard for her; she didn’t really have any friends to speak of. Pete though was wonderful! He’d seen the toll this was taking on her and set her up in her very own little studio. It wasn’t much to talk about, and it certainly wasn’t in an affluent part of town, but the time spent missing Pete had transferred itself into building her own little hair empire. Pete had been a little annoyed at first by the magazines and paint charts laying around their flat, but once he saw how much energy she was putting into the project he seemed almost relieved that she was busy more often than not. She knew though that that was only because he felt guilty for neglecting her… what else could it be? Within months, she’d created a little spot of heaven and built up a small but reliable list of clients. They always returned once they’d visited her, she was a good listener you see, as well as proficient at her trade. She’d had years of practise living with her mother who spouted nonsense about the neighbours 24/7. At home, she often tried to talk about about her plans for the salon or her current clientele, but Pete always joked that he’d married one woman and he certainly didn’t want to hear the gossip of dozens of others- especially when they were of the blue rinse rebels variety. She understood. He was tired of course, he worked so hard and he needed a little space now and then. Perfectly understandable…

That morning, Caroline opened the salon promptly as normal, allowing herself time for a drink before her first client. As she sipped on the bittersweet coffee, she idly perused one of the many high-fashion hair magazines she bought in for her clients. The sound of laughter passing by outside caught her attention and as she looked up, she caught her reflection in the mirror. The woman gazing back at her no longer reflected how she felt inside. There were lines around her eyes and her once chiselled cheek bones needed more help from the contour these days. Grey hair swept from her temples like waves along the shoreline. She smiled as she recalled her old boss telling her that stylists never have time for their own hair. That smile quickly faded as she saw the well-coiffed image of Pete in her mind. Suit pressed, shoes shined within an inch of their lives, hair precisely trimmed and the subtle scent of a recently purchased of aftershave… he said he was bored of his usual… that he fancied a change. Perhaps it was time she did the same.

The sound of the door dragged her back into the here and now, as her 9 am walked in and greeted her with the usual effervescent smile. Julia reminded her of her younger self; full of dreams for the future but until recently very little else in the way of a life. Over the past few months however, their hour-long conversations had turned to tales of a new man in her life. Caroline recognised in Julia that same excitement that she had experienced at the beginning of her own relationship; the same adoration in her face when she spoke of him. Julia had confided in Caroline that their relationship was a bit hush-hush at the moment because of his ‘current situation’. Apparently, he’d been stuck in a dead relationship for years, he and his wife had nothing in common except a mortgage. She’d laughed along politely with this, but she honestly couldn’t imagine what hell it would be to live under the same roof as someone you didn’t love. To be truthful, Caroline wasn’t sure what she made of this infidelity at first as she had never been one to be unfaithful, although to be fair she had never been presented with the opportunity... However, she had swelled with pride when Julia said she could trust her with her exploits, that she knew she’d understand, that she saw her as the mother figure she’d never had. She had been so thrilled for Julia when she’d excitedly whispered that she was pregnant, and that after all these months her partner was finally making plans to divorce. A baby was something Caroline had longed for but getting married ‘rather late in the day’ as Pete had phrased it, it just wasn’t a risk he wanted to take.
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Caroline took Julia’s jacket, another thoughtful present from her man she said, and hung it carefully on the padded hanger in the small back room. When she returned, Julia was smiling down at her mobile. Another text from him. Little messages sent throughout the day to make her smile she said. As Caroline fastened the black cape securely around Julia’s shoulders, she felt a tide of sadness wash over her. What must it be like to be wanted in that way? To feel so… connected. She missed that closeness but supposed things just naturally changed with time. She gently swept Julia’s hair from the neck of the cape, noticing as she did, a pair of delicate sapphire earrings. Julia cocked her head to the side, giving her a better look. “You like them?” asked Julia, “they were a present. He said they matched my eyes.” Caroline’s eyes met those of Julia in the mirror, her world crumbled as she stared into a pair of hazel eyes, a perfect reflection of her own.